Ten Things I Would Rather Do Than Watch the Seattle Mariners Try to Hit.

1. Pass a kidney stone.

2. Watch a 24-hour marathon of “Keeping Up With the Kardashians”.

3. Attend a Nickelback/Creed concert–front row.

4. Spend an afternoon discussing world affairs with Tucker Carlson.

5. Eat a platter of shellfish–I’m allergic.

6. Take a fastball to the head from Ubaldo Jimenez–without a helmet.

7. Get medical treatment from Conrad Murray.

8. Read any book by Nicolas Sparks.

9. Listen to Fran Drescher narrate the Old Testament.

10. Go for a bike ride with Eric Byrnes.


2 Responses

  1. HAHA I def think #9 ought to be moved up…… but you did forget a couple…
    like taking relationship advice from Tiger woods… and/or sharing a bathroom with Ben Roethlisberger… just saying..

  2. Or having to line up against Ndamokung Suh

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